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Jan 6, 2005 16:27:28 GMT -5
Post by FAME on Jan 6, 2005 16:27:28 GMT -5
due to recent comments..i need to ask this... am i the only person who thinks that it aint baout no aids/hiv/condom thing???.... sex is supose to be an act of passion ,intimacy,etc between 2 people who love/care/feel for each other...am i right???..... all this political shit is the reason why the youth are so confused.... one minute..its wait till you are of age...then its gee...wear a condom...then its...hey..dont trust your husband/wife cause you dont know how faithful he/she is.... got damn!!! are we that dense that we are goin around fuckin for no reason??...women...ya'll givin up pussy that damn bad? ..niggas ya'll stickin ya dicks in whatever you find? ....shit... you dont have to carry a fuckin condom....cause hell..before the condom...you need to understand you aint suppose to be fuckin in the first place unles you married...point blank...and if you marreid and use one..thats your business...it could be a form of child contracaption...cause if you still worried about aids/hiv when you married..WHAT THE FUCK YOU MARRIED FOR? ?......... reason people..have a reason!!!!.... i dont carry condoms...why...hell..why should i ?...im not goin aroun dlookin to get ass!!!!...i carry beat cds..why?..im LOOKING FOR PEOPLE TO BUY BEATS!!!..get my point??....and since im date'n someone..i really dont need to carry it unless we haven sex.....BUT...the fact is..we dont NEED to have sex....untill the time i pop a ring on that girl finger..... i mean..sex is a blissfully wondeful thing...but but it aint worth unwed parents...etc.....(fyi...my son was planned for anyone who had an objective view about my last statement...)
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JuGii
FRESHMAN
FRESHMAN
Crazy People don't know they are crazy!
Posts: 131
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sex.
Jan 6, 2005 16:35:42 GMT -5
Post by JuGii on Jan 6, 2005 16:35:42 GMT -5
I feel that like so much everybody make a big deal about having sex, pessuing other people into doing it, or not to do it . U see the posters, on the TV i hear it on the radio and about wrap it up... u can't tell nobody to wrap it up unless they want to unless thats what they believe unless they have a heads up on whats going on and even then they don't care.... some people are just careless
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Jan 6, 2005 17:13:06 GMT -5
Post by FAME on Jan 6, 2005 17:13:06 GMT -5
*duly noted.
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Jan 6, 2005 18:34:11 GMT -5
Post by MsLady on Jan 6, 2005 18:34:11 GMT -5
sex should be about passion, commitment, and intimacy between two people that fully understand that they are about to give unto to each other something so precious and special and if u out sexing everybody at what point is sex ever special or is it only about some cheap thrill to simply get ur rocks only to be left with some empty feeling of not having truly connected to the person u were with? and why do ppl give it up so easily......they dont know diddly about that person other than they are good-looking and under the assumption that they have some good sex to offer......sex without commitment just brings into to play tooooooo many "what if's?"...........i hate to say this but me & one of my closest girlfriends have said that in today's world with so much going on in relationships between ppl that a woman feels the need to wear condoms even with her husband as an extra precaution b/c she doesnt want him bringing anything home to her with all the cheating ppl do or the increased awareness of men being on the "DL".....if one is ever put in a situation where their mate brought something home to them they are left with the feeling of damn why was i so sure of my mate that he wouldnt cheat or even she these days.............i hate to say this but i think 85% of couples cheat and the figures may be higher than that but today's happenings makes one feel the need to wear condoms even in marriage
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Jan 7, 2005 0:15:43 GMT -5
Post by MzCurvalicious on Jan 7, 2005 0:15:43 GMT -5
fame, once again, i 100% agree with you that sex is an act that should take place between a man and woman or woman and woman or man and man (whatever you prefer I wont knock it) when there is love, trust, passion and committment involved. I can speak for me and say that sex is an emotional committment which is why I've never been the type to want to have or enjoy casual sex, yes, my demons got me and I have had a one night stand before. Mistake, yes, does it mean that I am a bad person? No. I certainly hope not. I've even talked to msL about this, how Im following her lead. Even when I lost my viriginity I didnt think of it as something that should be just "handed" away. And my comment about the condoms was just like whats wrong with being aware, as I stated earlier, I dont look at condoms as being a backup plan for a booty call. I know people that go around the club flossin condoms like they are going to bang errything walkin with a slit between their legs, is that me? Hell nah! and you know it. I just didnt see why you thought it was such a negative thing that a person carries them. I think all women should carry them. I think that if you are in a relationship with someone and they are worthy enough to have you in that sexual way, then yes, condoms should be used. I cant knock anyone for what they do, sex or no sex. I can only speak for Nikki. My statement about the condoms did not mean "oh lets go out and have sex with lots of random people" its more like "ok if your going to have sex, atleast do it right, and protect yourself" Yes I know condoms are not 100%, very much aware, but it does detract from the risks of std's and unplanned pregnancies. Im just being realistic when I tell people they should use condoms. I believe you can preach abstinence/celibacy and you can preach safe sex. Its just a harsh reality that you will have those people who sleep around, the least you can do is tell them to carry condoms with them.
I guess i can understand the stigma of a person who may have a million condoms in a drawer and you look at them like WTF, are u a whore or something? =\ Even my damn sister got all up in my bizz cuz she knows I have condoms, im like GEEZUS I thought that was the right thing to do. Doesnt mean Im having sex, doesnt mean im sleeping with the entire city of Detroit or Pontiac. I am just aware of whats going on. Shoot, I passed about 90% of that box around to some of my friends cuz I know they have casual sex and I just want them to protect themselves if the encounter happens.
there is absolutely nothing wrong with sex. Intercourse is a humanly beautiful act that should be shared between two people who love, care, honor and respect one another. Not to be passed around like candy on the play ground. Unless you two have an understanding that the relationship you have entered will be one of a monogamous one, then condoms should always be used... and yes, FAME, why marry a person if you dont trust them? Shat, I dunno. I cant answer that, cuz I've never been married. But I just agree with MsL that you can never be 100% of the actions of another person. Unless of course that person is attached to you with a ball and chain. I hope the number of cheating couples in the US is not 85%, cuz if it is, looks like Imma be a single woman for life.
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Jan 7, 2005 2:41:02 GMT -5
Post by famezwife on Jan 7, 2005 2:41:02 GMT -5
I'm truly lovin' this convo.. very positive indeed... i agree with EVERYONE'S post up here... i do believe that it's a serious decision to be intimate with somebody... i think one of the reason's why i'm with the person i'm with is because they heard my reasoning for being abstinent... and not only heard me... but felt me... and not only felt me... but JOINED me...
**DISCLAIMER** and before i continue... what i'm about to post has to do with what *I've* been through... studied and have come to believe... not trying to change anyone.... or dispute anyone else's beliefs... ::Whew:: now... lets keep the party goin'...
having sex with somebody is a joining of spirits... history (bible) will tell you that the actual ceremony of marriage was for the couple to pledge their commitment before the family... but the actual *marriage* didn't occur until the man and woman became *one* in the bedroom... sex is waaaay deeper than just two people who feelin' eachother and want to be emotionally connected... it's actually two people who are creating an ajoining *spirit*... sex isn't wrong... nothing about it is... but when it's being done outside of a marriage... it's dead wrong... why do you think it hurts so bad when you and whoever you been sexin' break up... sex was given to a wife and a husband to have until death do them part... so when you break up with your man/woman and you're hurt... slowly goin' through depression because yaw are not together anymore... you were actually hurting like a widow/widower would from losing their husband/wife... death was the only thing *meant* to break up a wife and husband... so let me ask all of you out there... how many times have you been married and widowed?? and just like everybody who eventually comes to the conclusion of abstinence... i had to run into a wall or two before i realized that i'm worth much more than a relationship involving a katt who makes you think he loves you... and wants to have way too much sex...with a side of not enough relationship... it's truly an issue of self abuse and NOT loving yourself... it says in Romans that you should present your body as a living sacrifice holy and acceptable... and i truly believe that... because if it ain't sexin' that you're abusing yourself with it could be somethin' else (food, drugs, etc)... so yeah... you can be abstinent... and not have sex... and not even curse... but still eat sixteen servings of grits at one sitting and still be abusive to yourself... what is your drug?? ..sex is categorized as abuse outside of marriage... i've come a long way from that... and i'll never *ALLOW* a man take me back to that point ever again... no matter much i'm lovin' him or FEELIN' him.. ain't enough feelin' in the world to make me disrespect my *Father*...
@fame... baby... what happened that brought you to this convo...lol...you seemed a lil heated and frantic on your statements... maybe you need to come *home* and tell me about it....
~*blue*
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Jan 7, 2005 9:42:55 GMT -5
Post by nobulshit on Jan 7, 2005 9:42:55 GMT -5
everyone has made interesting points on this issue, great topic we can build on this for days months to years because it has substance.....now it's funny to me how when a women sleeps around alot she's labeled a whore but to some people when men do it.......there looked at as a player or what not......famezwife made good points with scriptures and to add to that men as well as women were not to make whoremongers of themselves.....i got into a big big debate with a couple of my partners one single and one is married and they shocked me by saying they would go to a club and actually leave and have a one night stand with a person.....and i told them THEY'RE FUCKING CRAZY you should have more self respect than that......a person really has to be missing alot on the inside and have serious issues to sleep with some one they don't know from adam.......i'm sure we've all made mistakes growing up it's called life and we're suposed to learn from those........i hurt alot of womens feeling when i was younger unintentionally and as i got older i've changed alot of my ways for the better.......my partners went on and on trying to tell me that i would sleep with some one that i met at a club and she looked good.......i told they have life fucked up literally......first off i'm a grown ass man second i told them the physical is what we naturally go off of when we meet people.....however i am not the type of person that is impressed by just good looks......i have to get to know the person now we can have mind sex.......and build on whatever but i would never just take a female up on that offer........I'M WORTH TO MUCH.........to go out like that.....condoms are very useful in this day and age...and the brothers on the dl make it even worst out here........you can build trust in your mate...husband.....wife......friend.....lover....etc.....but in the begining of the day and at the end your trust should be with the father and self........we can't change people or hold ourselves responsible for someone else's actions.......so if your in a relationship and your sleeping with your mate and they step out on you.....alot of times people will be themselves for it..they may feel they weren't doing something right in the relationship or they caused a person to go that way.....but we all are human and everyone will make thier own bed and lie and die in it.........
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Jan 7, 2005 14:19:24 GMT -5
Post by FAME on Jan 7, 2005 14:19:24 GMT -5
*....she took the words out of my ever lovin mouth....exactly who i was waitin..........
*.........i will be *home* today....
....and to add on .....(cause you cant argue when someone done brung the good book's words in to the picture..lol)....anyone..who is doing any wrong with self at this point..who as read this post..is now out of the dark..you are in the light...you must now be held accountable for your actions and change ways...you cant read something like this..and go on living in sin,fear,darkness,ignorance,etc......thats just creating more demons for you to deal with..and alos securing your place in the cozy warm pits of hell's downtown condo establishments...lol....its all about thouhgt people...think..use ya noddle.
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Jan 7, 2005 15:08:45 GMT -5
Post by nobulshit on Jan 7, 2005 15:08:45 GMT -5
not the downtowns condo yo.......that's real thou........like i bust my partners wig when i told them they were crazy as hell to sleep with someone they don't know from adam........who in their right mind would want that.........not the kid........nobul happy about all post leave board singing........coming to america lol......... she's my queen to be.......
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Jan 7, 2005 15:59:00 GMT -5
Post by FAME on Jan 7, 2005 15:59:00 GMT -5
and i can hear you singin that shit too...lmfao!!!
yeah...niggas are so pappr thin nowadays...to be real..alot of parents aint even breeding them right now...kids aint shit!!...this lil bad ass up on the corner at the udf was like.."hey nigga...go get me a blunt,some newports,and a boone's farm!!"...im like"shorty...how old is you yo?"...this lil nigga was like "12....".................i rest my case.
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Jan 10, 2005 12:58:28 GMT -5
Post by MsLady on Jan 10, 2005 12:58:28 GMT -5
I hope the number of cheating couples in the US is not 85%, cuz if it is, looks like Imma be a single woman for life. even though i think the numbers are that high on ppl cheating it still does NOT deter me from the thought of wanting to get married and spend my life with someone....AND NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS IN MY MARRIAGE i want to work things out with my spouse because i feel like everything can be worked through EXPECT ABUSE.........and MzCurv does the thought that a boyfriend could cheat on you keep you from wanting to have a boyfriend???
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Jan 10, 2005 20:22:18 GMT -5
Post by MzCurvalicious on Jan 10, 2005 20:22:18 GMT -5
yanno what @ msL, my thinking that a guy will cheat on me if we are just boyfriend and girlfriend, (ugh I despise that whole title nonsense), fortunately does not keep me from dating or wanting a "boyfriend". I think I can say that to this day, I've never been cheated on, or that I am aware that I was being decieved. I guess it would be devestating to find out that someone you love and you gave them a piece of your "soul" has committed such an act, but I dont think it would be as devestating as finding out my husband cheated on me. At the marriage level, its like you agreed before God that you would never decieve your mate, and dating, well I guess it seems like you would expect it more while just dating.
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ManicD513
PLAYGROUND BULLY
FRESHMAN
Lies, secrets, half way descent sex...all a part of life.
Posts: 237
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sex.
Jan 16, 2005 19:26:50 GMT -5
Post by ManicD513 on Jan 16, 2005 19:26:50 GMT -5
Yo, everything on this messege board is real. Famezwife had some imput that really took it to church, but I have to say to fame's responding statement, you can bring a person to the light, but you can't make them open their eyes. Take it from a person who's been in a downward spiral since her senior year in high school....day before thanksgiving. Please Note: I'm about to get really real, so if you can't handle a die hard opinion and truth, don't go any further. I agree 110 percent to everyone's views here. Personally, I've always believed in waiting for sex until marriage. (That way there's no fuss about how good or bad it is because it's all you'll ever know) Unfortunatly, a guy I was into didn't want to wait that long...as a matter of fact he didn't want to wait at all, despite my feelings on it. So there I was, thrown into a world I wasn't ready for and didn't know how to handle. Sex to me has always been about power and emotions that people refuse to control. Even in my poetry, I compare sex and love to drugs. With my experiance, it's like someone forcing heroine into your body creating an addiction for something you never wanted. There are people that will swear up and down that when you have sex with someone, it's just physical and there is no spiritual aftermath....please. What do you do when someone uses you and tosses you to the side? You cry, you get angry, You feel a piece of you missingEven the most perfect of relationships could go wrong these days, it's best to just hold off until you're certain you want to make a life long commitment with someone and you go through that promise to God that there's only one person you're going to be with the rest of your life. It takes two to honor that promise and it's a sad fact that most take that for granted these days. Heck, I was dating a married 20 year old and didn't know it until he told me one day that his wife wanted him back and he was done with me. Life and love are crazy things, so if you know someone with a clean slate, tell em to hang on to it and DEFEND it. Condoms are cool to have in case one day you make an informed decision with your partner...but if you have em, question yourself on if you feel obligated to use them. Bottom line with me? Sex is an act often lead to by temptation, you always have a choice to resist it. Making love should always be reserved for the right one.
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Jan 19, 2005 1:14:09 GMT -5
Post by famezwife on Jan 19, 2005 1:14:09 GMT -5
@manicd... mama...you were NOT lying when you said real... i love real though... and when you said it's like an addiction... that was ridiculously real...it really and literally is a piece of you missing... and you get to a point where after sooo many bad relationships... it feels like nothing is left... and the only way to build yourself(*spirit*) back up is to just be alone... how can you give yourself to someone when you feel like there's nothing there to give... i think i read my baby say.. you have to fall in love with yourself first... and being out there having sex and doin' all that mess... or like you said Manic... "being addicted to sex".. the ulitimate drug... is not love... and people... why can't we stop thinking that sex equals love... you can be in love with someone and not give your spirit to someone who have no intentions of being married to you or you to them...Like Manic said... "Sex is an act often lead to by temptation"....i'm seriously feeling ManicD's post... it was real and simply put..
*blue*
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ManicD513
PLAYGROUND BULLY
FRESHMAN
Lies, secrets, half way descent sex...all a part of life.
Posts: 237
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sex.
Jan 19, 2005 1:46:50 GMT -5
Post by ManicD513 on Jan 19, 2005 1:46:50 GMT -5
@manicd... mama...you were NOT lying when you said real... i love real though... and when you said it's like an addiction... that was ridiculously real...it really and literally is a piece of you missing... and you get to a point where after sooo many bad relationships... it feels like nothing is left... and the only way to build yourself(*spirit*) back up is to just be alone... how can you give yourself to someone when you feel like there's nothing there to give... i think i read my baby say.. you have to fall in love with yourself first... and being out there having sex and doin' all that mess... or like you said Manic... "being addicted to sex".. the ulitimate drug... is not love... and people... why can't we stop thinking that sex equals love... you can be in love with someone and not give your spirit to someone who have no intentions of being married to you or you to them...Like Manic said... "Sex is an act often lead to by temptation"....i'm seriously feeling ManicD's post... it was real and simply put.. *blue* Yo, I'm happy you feelin me though! Gurl, we gonna have to get together and chill one day, off grip. I can you as one of my best friends. You got some deep thoughts and I vibe with em whole heartedly.
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